So, let me start by saying I'm not very good at writing this I feel like though I know that all that needs to be said comes out as long as I let it. I will start by saying that I was first baptized when I was probably 10 or so, though I don't remember exactly when it was, and I don't really remember anything about it except knowing that I talked to the minister of my church at the time about it and giving the answers I knew he "wanted" to hear for me to get baptized. Truth is I didn't really know what it meant to be a Christian nonetheless actually know what I believed myself. It wasn't till midway through middle school I started thinking about what I believed or even really kind of forming my own opinions on stuff for the most part. All I really knew is what they were teaching in school and that I wasn't very obedient towards anyone. I had quit doing homework in the fourth grade, started fighting in the fifth as well as had cussed out a teacher, and went to class in the sixth with the intent to correct teachers everytime they made a mistake. Then there was a night in seventh grade that I got really sick and actually had to go the hospital. I don't remember much about that night except that I felt incredibly scared and had no idea what to think about it. I spent the next three days lying in a hospital bed sleeping and thinking, then another two days at home. After that though I started to at least have some opinions myself and wondering more about life. When eighth grade came around it marked the start of my life that I associate a lot with death for the next few years, which made me question a lot and unsure about what to believe. All I knew was that I was hanging out with the wrong people and getting into all the stuff I shouldn't; wrong relationships, smoking and drinking, disrespecting teachers even more, and really disrespecting my parents. I was still going to church though at this point we had switched churches after a year of bouncing around between churches, and had been at this new one for a few years. This went on through my freshman, sophomore, and junior years. At the end of my junior year came the moment that I will never forget. My youth minister approached me and asked what I was doing over the summer and when I responded with nothing till the end of July or the beginning of August probably he made an interesting proposal that I laughed at at first. He wanted me to go to a Christian camp, same one I had been to every year for several years till I had gotten into high school, but then had stopped going for some reason. After a week or so I finally let him know that I would only because I respected him a ton. I honestly don't remember much of what was discussed that week at camp but I remember a ton of stuff that happened. The theme was "The Office" which was based of course off the tv show, we fasted the whole week from one meal a day, I had been assigned to a camp family that included three people from my church (two of which were the leaders), a guy I know from another church cause me and sister had been talking for a while, and five other people. I didn't talk much at first, which wasn't a surprise to anyone really, but as the week progressed I ended up talking more and more. I was the oldest person in my family that wasn't a leader, which made me by default the leader of our family out of the campers, so anything that didn't involve our leaders I led, or at least had to organize. This included morning devotions, what we would clean that day, our nightly family meeting, and any other things that didn't include the leaders. As you could imagine, devotions were weird at first as I didn't really believe anything I was talking about. At least, at first I didn't. The more I had to look up for the devotions the more I learned what it meant to be a Christian and the more interested I became. I began reading the Bible every chance I got at the camp. By the third day I had applied to a Christian university, and of all things to major in, for youth and family ministry. On the fourth day I broke down and confessed that I hadn't really believed to the people from my church that were at the camp and had been playing in the band just cause I enjoyed it, not cause I believed in what we were doing. On the fifth and final night (which was the only night we had dinner) I stood before the camp and made the same confessions I had made to my church group the night before and had gathered my church and camp family up with me and thanked them and accepted Christ as my savior. I was baptized at church the following Sunday for the second time actually knowing where I stood and what I believed in.
This is my story on how I've ended up believing what I do today. I am no where near perfect still, I've messed up a ton, sometimes more than others, especially as some people know, in college. I'm doing my best to fix things though and become the man God wants me to be, and wholeheartedly; I believe in what the Bible says.
